LC's Better-Than-Sex List

So, my girlfriends & I have been discussing the drought we're experiencing lately.

And while we're all super concerned about H20, the environment, and all the same shit Al Gore worries about, too; we're more concerned about the MAN drought we're going through in our own wretched lives.

Even though we may have men in our lives, they're giving us dry spells.

Al Gore may not understand this.
Bill Clinton? Bill might. He is married to Hillary, after all.
I would imagine she withholds sex from him, too.
Which would explain the Lewinsky debaucle.

But I digress.

In an attempt to find suitable substitutes for the lack of lovin' we're all going through at the moment, I've compiled a list of options for things I would consider to be "Better Than Sex."

Numero Uno:
Sprinkles Cupcakes.
One bite= pure, unadulterated sugar fix, right in the heart of Scottsdale.
Put down that porn, and run out to Sprinkles, instead:
4501 N. Scottsdale Road, at Scottsdale and Camelback. Call 480-970-4321 for details.


Numero Dos:
Chambord Margaritas.
Found at: Z Tejas (my fave is the one off the I-10 & Ray Rd in Ahwautukee.)
Whoa, buddy. Let me tell you, when they give you a limit on how many you can drink--there is a reason.
Come to think of it, these might be better than sex, but if you drink past your limit, they might also LEAD to sex.
But hey, two birds, one stone, right?
www.ztejas.com


Numero Tres:
Breakfast at TC Eggington's.
No doubt, one of my favorite guilty pleasures, right in the heart of Mesa, located on Alma School, just off the US 60. The staff is bright, friendly, personable, and although I don't think there's anything too sexy about the place, the food sure as hell IS sexy. My favorite is French Toast, which is an inch-thick slice of sweet cinnamon bread dipped in batter. Heaven on freakin' earth.
www.tcegg.com or 480-345-9288 (for more information)



If there is a lover in your life, the surefire way to get them to end your drought is to show them this list of alternatives you've found. Perhaps they will find a way to satisfy your needs, end this pathetic drought (which, let's face it, isn't really good for ANYONE'S "environment") and take you out for quality meals, desserts, and drinks that will make anyone want to scream with pleasure.

Although the establishments? Might look down on that just a little.

Get your kicks where you can, friends, and check out the places that top LC'S Better-Than-Sex List Today.

You Want This

It is rather cliche to even say this, but we all know that sex sells. There's no bones about it. (No pun intended.) Give a consumer the option to buy something boring and predictable, or the chance to buy something new and fresh with a touch of sex appeal in the packaging or the title, and they are all over it like condoms on a frat boy.

Here is a transcript of a text-message convo I had with a friend of mine, who is very, very much a straight man, single, good-looking, mid-twenties:

ME: I hope that you didn't get offended last night by what I said.
HIM: Me? Offended? Do you realize who are you talking to?
ME: I know, but sometimes, people get offended by my vulgarity, and I know my mind is in the gutter sometimes.
HIM: Mine stays there.

I often have to check myself when I'm talking with my guy friends. Having grown up around a lot of boys in my family, at home, I became accustomed to hearing them talk, and having mostly guy friends doesn't help improve my language, humor, or my ability to quit telling dirty jokes. (Something I consider a hobby. Hey, your nerdy ass collects stamps or postcards, I tell dirty jokes. It's all relative.)

One thing you have to realize about hanging with the boys is, you could be talking about the NBA, hell, you could be talking about nuclear physics, and somehow or another, the conversation will always inevitably shift to sex. Men usually find a way to incorporate a sexual innuendo into just about everything they say. Women usually say this is what makes them superior to men. If this is the case, none of those women would ever want to hang out with me.

Regardless of what people believe about sexual innuendo, sexy advertising or appealing to people's sexual appetites, whether through photos or phrases or my jokes, I found this book eye-catching immediately when I saw it featured on Amazon.com. I already know stylist Eric Daman's new book, "You Know You Want It" is going to be on my must-have list. Eric Daman is the same guy who is the costume designer for Gossip Girl (LOVE IT!)and he is so gifted, it's ridiculous. The book includes a forward by Leighton Meester, a.k.a. Blair Waldorf on Gossip Girl. After I read "You Know You Want It," I'm sure I'll rave about it, because I'm a fan of all things fashion, but I believe I will love purchasing it just as much because of the uber-catchy cover. Seriously, how sexy is that title?

I mean, has Eric Daman been following me around to bars, or monitoring my text messages or drunk dial conversations for the past 10 years? Because the title? Sounds like something my crazy ass would say, after, say, 5 or 6 cocktails.

I know I want it (take that as you will) but when it comes to this book, I'll be picking it up at Barnes and Noble.

And if you're one lucky guy...meet me in the stacks at Barnes & Noble.

How hot is that?
You know you want it.

xoxo,
LC