A Real Bombshell

There are three things about me that have not changed since the 7th grade:

1. My inability to shut the f*#k up when it’s inappropriate to speak.
2. My height: I will be 5’2 for the rest of my life. I was destined to be a short little girl forever. Hence, the massive collection of stilettos in my closets.
3. My bra size: I think this is directly linked to the fact that, in 7th grade, I made fun of my best friend for having AA boobs. “Why do you even NEED a bra? I’m the one who has B, almost C cup breasts, at 13 years of age!”

For any teenage adolescent bitches out there who want to get on their high horse and ride that bitch into the sunset, beware: that little, snide comment not only made my best friend feel bad until she magically bloomed into a B cup over the summer, it no doubt brought me the worst karma ever in the boobs department.

I got stuck with B or C cup boobs for the longest time.

However, when I walk into Victoria’s Secret, the friendly sales girls always reassure me that my “girls” are, actually, a 36C. Most women would cringe in embarrassment to declare their cup size on a public website. Well, if you know me well enough, not much embarrasses me. (Which no doubt is making my mother cringe in embarrassment right now.)

36C isn’t so bad, right? Well, I don’t think so. During the summer months, I can get away with wearing cutesy little sundresses without a bra. The guy I was going on fun little dates with this summer once spent about an hour or so staring right at my chest as we played pool. I think he forgot the rules of the game because of my deep-V sundress. I don’t think he cared that I had gone without a bra, in fact, I think he preferred it that way.

There are definite advantages to being a small cup size, but no matter what, we all have “grass is greener” syndrome at least a time or two in our lives.

Which is why, over the summer, I found myself in the offices of a plastic surgeon in Scottsdale, asking myself, should I increase my cup size to a D? DD? Or should I keep them all natural?

Victoria’s Secret came up with the new Miraculous collection of bras, appropriately titled, the ‘Bombshell’ bra. This bra promises to increase your size by two cup sizes. I didn’t believe all the hype, and was leery about the whole “memory foam” concept, so I thought I’d test it out for all of you shoppers in cyberspace.

When I was in the fitting room, I asked the sales girl “What happens when the guy takes it off, and that bad boy hits the floor? You think he’s not gonna hear the sound of 2 lbs of memory foam hitting the tile floor?”

She said, “Honey, after he stares at your chest the entire night and fantasizes about taking the damn thing off, I don’t think he’s frankly going to give a shit about what’s hitting the floor.”

Good point.

Still, I felt it was false advertising. I bought it anyway. I wore it to the post office on my first journey out of the house after being on medical leave for almost a month. I ran into a friend of my mother’s. She stared at my chest for about 5 minutes, while having an important conversation with me. She was telling me about the mastectomy she was going to be having in a few days.

It could not have been shittier timing.

I then went over to my sister-in-law’s for a glass of wine.

“Oh my God,” she said as she opened the door. “Your boobs are freakin’ HUGE!” “But hey, your waist looks really tiny.”

Okay, it worked. Case closed.



Although I bought the bra, increased my cup size, and managed to draw quite a bit of focus to my upper body, I realized something: I am much more comfortable in regular, thinly padded bras. Although having a little extra “oomph” up top is nice, and although it’s interesting to see what you might look like if you had your breasts implanted with silicone, I think I’m quite happy with the perky boobs I’ve had since the 7th grade. I didn’t need $5000 surgery, or even a $50 bra, to make me satisfied with “the twins.” That appreciation had to come from within myself.

And to my adolescent best friend, who I so callously and insensitively teased over 15 years ago: trust me, boobs? They’re kinda overrated. Sure, they serve a purpose, and they’re nice to have, and cleavage? Hey, it can get you quicker service and sometimes even a round of drinks.

But in the end, your own breasts, whether nestled in the cups of a memory-foam filled brassiere, or liberated in a slinky cotton sundress like LC in the summertime, are always your best bet.

To purchase the Victoria's Secret Miraculous Bombshell Bra for yourself today, order online at www.victoriassecret.com, or at your nearest store. For a bra like this, I'd recommend trying it in the store before you buy it, and also getting fitted by a bra specialist first. This way, you'll know all your options before buying. Which, when it comes to your breasts, should always be a rule of thumb no matter what you're doing to enhance your "girls."

The Lady in Lace

Initially, I bought the black lacy top below because I intended to throw on a nude colored cami I had purchased at Nordstrom and layer this top over it, and then add a fitted, tailored, sleek black blazer from White House Black Market over that, and wear it with black tailored Theory pants to work.

Since I am on medical leave, and since I work in a small town where I get little to no appreciation for my sense of style, I figured I'd pair it with a lovely black bra I bought at Victoria's Secret recently, a pair of jeans or a black leather mini, and wear it to go have a drink (or two, or three) with my friends, or on a date. (Yes, I said 'date.' And no, hell is not freezing over.)

Kristin Cavallari, I understand we both have a penchant for starting fights with annoying, needy and pathetic, and somewhat dim-witted girls (like Audrina Patridge, for instance) "stealing" other people's boyfriends, and Stephen Colletti (well, you seem to have left him in the dust, but my love for Stephen is still goin' strong) but did you have to go and wear a similar top, too? I mean, you have all day to spend in the gym. Me? Not so much.

Even still, I will rock this lacy top & still hope for the day when I, like Kristin, can steal Brody Jenner away from a Playboy playmate (Jayde Nicole) who looks like a cross-eyed freak of nature. Talk about a butter face. (As in, 'Everything's good, but-her-FACE!)

Again, a girl can dream.

To buy your own version of this top, visit www.bebe.com or Bebe stores nationwide, or you can pick up a similar and still very cute version at Express stores, or online at www.expressfashion.com.

A Tradition of Excellence

My family has plenty of traditions. I'd like to think that the women in my family have legacies, things we leave behind, ideas, thoughts, visions, dreams, and hopes that we pass along from woman to woman. It is these things that make us a unit; these values that keep us close-knit even when the world would like to break us apart; it is this connection we have to each other that reminds us who we are and what we stand for.

Some of these traditions involve recipes, and delicious food. Some involve morals and beliefs, even our mothers' conventional or often, unconventional wisdom. They involve sitting around drinking coffee or mixed drinks or even wine and sharing the same (sometimes embellished) stories time after time. And some are more serious, not necessarily suggestions, we pass along to each other--but expectations. Like education.

All of our younger generation have attended ASU; our time at Arizona State was not only invaluable, it is something we all share, a love and time honored tradition. Being a Sun Devil meant so much more than getting a piece of paper after 4 or 5 years. It was something to be proud of. It represented toil, triumph, accomplishment. Being a Sun Devil was just as much about our hearing our mothers' voices in our ears whispering, "I know you can do it, mija," as it was our own perseverance and patting each other on the back or proofreading essays late at night for one another.

So when my youngest cousin, Priscilla (our baby!) started her journey as a Sun Devil this year, you better believe I was thrilled that she was carrying on our family tradition of excellence, at one of the finest universities in the country. She loves college life; and what's not to love? After visiting her at her dorms with April and my nephew Alex a few weeks ago, I saw all the changes happening on campus and all the developments, and it is truly beautiful. It made me even more proud to be an alumni.

It also, for some odd reason, gives me chills when I walk into Victoria's Secret to go shopping for all my sexy lingerie and found a whole wall devoted to ASU PINK merchandise. The new collection, from Victoria's Secret PINK line, is totally cute, reasonably priced, and adorably feminine...such a great way to show your spirit at an ASU game, or running around town.

One value the women in my family have passed along is pride. Having pride in one's work. Taking pride in the work you do in your community. Strengthening relationships and bonds within the family, so that our familial pride shines through, no matter where we go. Having pride as a woman to walk out of a potentially damaging situation in the workplace, or in a relationship. And having pride in all the big and even the little accomplishments we make day by day. I had that pride in myself before I even left for college at Arizona State University, but when I emerged as a college educated woman, I think I not only learned first hand what having pride really meant, I exemplified it.

Watching a DVD Priscilla created for a class that was about leadership, and passing along those values, prioritizing education as a means for achieving your goals, and hearing how she plans to pass that along to my nephew Alex, and hopefully, to my children, someday, too, meant the world to me. It meant that traditions are alive and well, and as those of us who've gone out in Maroon & Gold know, we do tradition better than anybody.



Buy your own ASU merchandise today at Victoria's Secret in the PINK collection; visit Superstition Springs Mall, Chandler Fashion Center, or San Tan Village for the best selections, or online at www.victoriassecret.com. Go Devils! ;)

Love Potion Number 'Nine'

I absolutely love musicals. I love movies, and film, and theatre, and more than anything, I love when filmmakers from today create movies based on the work of past legends--so it is no big surprise I'm anxious to see the new Rob Marshall film "Nine" which is based on Federico Fellini's film, '8 1/2.' Fellini is the same guy who created 'La Dolce Vita.'

On top of loving movies, I love the costumes and wardrobe, hair and makeup, and seeing how it all comes together. For those who think movies don't have an influence on our society, you need only consider how often movies inspire trends and fashion.

I'm so thrilled that some of the major stars in this film, slated to come out this year, include Nicole Kidman, Fergie, and my favorite, Penelope Cruz.

What made me most happy, perhaps, is reading on a blog today that Fergie and Penelope were directed to gain weight for the film, so that they would be more 'voluptuous' in their lingerie and sexy clothing. It's nice to see Hollywood recognize the hot factor that a little meat on the bones can have, especially when it's enveloped in lace and satin. It made me feel better about my own curves, and if anything inspired me to shop, it was knowing that all over the world, soon enough, people will see women who embraced curvy bodies and still wore super sexy underpinnings to dance around on screen.



In honor of the movie, I was inspired to purchase sexy lingerie myself, and while shopping online, found this gorgeous lingerie set, complete with garters and thigh heels, sure to raise the temperature of any man. And though I wouldn't flatter myself to believe I can compete with the likes of Fergie or Penelope on the hotness meter, when I have a gentleman in my life who will have the pleasure of seeing this set for himself, hopefully, he'll appreciate it.



In the meantime, I will hit up the gym and dance classes with the same diligence I'm sure Fergalicious and Cruz did, because even us girls with curves want more confidence when we slip into something a little more sexy.

To purchase this lingerie, go to: www.victoriassecret.com, where you'll find it under sleepwear, by clicking on the tab: 'Sexy Lingerie.' Spice up your personal life today, and stay tuned for more info on Rob Marshall's film, Nine, coming soon to theatres.